I have a friend who epitomizes “Living in the Moment”. When she is not happy in a job, she up and quits. If she has money in her pocket, she spends it. When she feels slighted, she lets everyone know. Yes, she lives in the moment, but is this helpful or harmful?
The idea of living in the moment really gained steam in the 2000s. It became part of a healthy lifestyle that stressed being aware of all that is going on around you. Living in the moment “means being conscious, aware and in the present with all of your senses. It means not dwelling on the past, nor being anxious or worrying about the future.” I think of it as being aware of how you are feeling at any given moment. It is taking in all the scents and colors as you walk along a path. Truly embracing every aspect of life as it happens.
Somewhere, though, the living in the moment movement has gone off the rails. When a person is more concerned with being happy that she will quit a gainful job without having a plan, then there is a problem. Being aware only of your own feelings and ignoring how your actions affect others is not “living in the moment,” it is selfish. Happiness comes from balanced lifestyles, not embracing each moment without a thought given to the future. Below are three times when it is best NOT to live in the moment.w
When Making a Life Decision
Getting married. Asking for a divorce. Buying a house. Opting to have, or not have, children. Changing careers. These are all big decisions that will affect your life as well as the lives of others around you. These decisions should be reflected upon and not decided on a whim. It is imperative that you examine your past big decisions to offer guidance on this one. It is also crucial that you examine your wants and needs for the future.
When You Suffer from Anxiety or Depression
I personally suffer from social anxiety. It has haunted me since Junior High School it has negatively impacted my life. To this day, I still dread going to networking events. If I chose to live in the moment, I would opt not to go to these events. However, this is not an optimal way to run a business or get through life. Looking at my past and contemplating what I wanted to achieve in the future, I decided that I needed therapy to help me overcome my social anxiety. Through a lot of reflection (looking back), introspection (looking within), and projection (looking forward), I have been able to break out of my shell. I still suffer from social anxiety, but I have tools that help me overcome the anxiety. That way, ironically, I can truly live in the moment.
When Looking at the Bigger Picture
The world is currently going through some difficult challenges. Terrorism, ecological disasters, and societal changes are just a few of the things that keep many people up at night worrying about the future. In these cases, would it not be better to ignore these large scale events and just live in the moment? A strong argument can be made for “yes.” However, this argument ignores the fact that humanity has always faced life changing events, and it has persevered.
When Attila the Hun invaded a village, it was not a good time for the villagers to contemplate the beauty of a flower in a field. Mt. Vesuvius erupting did not lend itself to Pompeiians reveling in the warmth they felt that afternoon. When marching from Selma to Montgomery, the participants were not concerned with reaching 10,000 steps. They wanted to change the racist Alabama voting system. And they did. Not by just living in the moment, but by envisioning a future and working to change it, no matter how long it took.
The Advantage of Living in the Moment
Despite all that I have written above, I do believe that there is a place for living in the moment. In fact, I wrote an article on how living in the moment helps Navy SEALs. Also, studies have shown that practicing mindfulness can lead to a happier life The point of this post is that living in the moment is not the be-all and end-all of life. Combined with planning for the future and reflecting on the past, it is a tool that you can use to help you live a full life.
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